


Can't kill the feelings

by Stunfisky



Category: A3! (Video Game)
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, Eventual Smut, Future Fic, M/M, Multi, the poly ship is subdued
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-29
Updated: 2020-01-30
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:14:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,216
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22457818
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stunfisky/pseuds/Stunfisky
Summary: Tsuzuru is not acting like himself and it's affecting everybody.  It's her job to set him straight.
Relationships: Furuichi Sakyou/Tachibana Izumi/Usui Masumi, Minagi Tsuzuru/Sakuma Sakuya
Kudos: 35





	1. Izumi's POV

**Author's Note:**

> Tsuzuru honestly feels like such a flat character for me right now and he's always commenting about Sakuya during training in my game. So I thought I'd try to get into his mind. Originally I just wanted to break the cutie, but I like happy ends. This is the result.   
> Also I wrote the first chapter at work and used my OT3 to lead the situation.   
> Smut will be in chapter 2~

"Sakuya is pure… almost too pure…" Tsuzuru's eyes looked to the redhead currently chatting with the rest of the Spring troupe.

Izumi tilted her head in confusion. While Tsuzuru often said such about the Spring leader he hadn't answered her question at all. Tsuzuru was distracted. She observed the micro reactions the brunette displayed. A heated look that she had never seen on him quickly replaced by guilt. She looked over to Sakuya who met Tsuzuru's gaze for a half second before looking away in disguised panic. She turned back to Tsuzuru before patting his shoulder and bringing his attention back to her. "Just take things slow and gentle, okay?" She smiled at the man's confusion before calling an end to the break.

The director knew that the scriptwriter had trouble voicing his feelings. She hoped that the encouragement would help him. However, that wasn't going to be the end of her help. No, she'd direct her actors to the happy ending of this act in the play of life. She had a plan, but she would need help. "Masumi, would you accompany me after practice?"

"For a date?" He asked eagerly.

Izumi sighed in response, "you're going to treat it like that anyway so fine." She had long gotten used to his antics and no longer protested so sharply to them. 

\---

It had been over a week now, but the plan had gotten nowhere. There was no change besides he own embarrassment for following Masumi's idea. She was not going to do that again. Tsuzuru's scolding at walking in on her and Masumi making out was nearly intolerable. At least he hadn't said anything when the same situation happened with Sakyou. Although his apologetic smile certainly held the same scolding behind it. She supposed there was one change, but it certainly hadn't gotten better. Tsuzuru had become quieter, not even responding to Citron's jabs. With the quiet came a form of pressure and everyone was beginning to feel it. She needed to fall back to her own plan as she didn’t believe Sakyou's plan would work. Forcing the situation may have worked for the Autumn troupe in the beginning but even back then she had to salvage parts of it.

"Sakuya! Over here." She waved from her booth in the cafe. 

"Sorry I'm late."

"Not at all. I went ahead and ordered your usual so it should be done soon."

"Really? Thanks!" He beamed. "So what's up? We usually hold these meetings in the dorm."

"I just thought a change of scenery would be beneficial." She sighed lightly, "less of a heavy atmosphere." 

"Yeah…" Sakuya looked down at his hands on the table. "I know this can’t go on. It's making everyone tense including me. I just don’t know how to approach him like that."

"Do you have any idea why Tsuzuru has gotten so distant?"

The red head shook his head, "not really. It seems like he's angry with me, but I can’t figure out what I did wrong. Itaru says that I didn’t do anything, that it's something Tsuzuru needs to deal with, but it's still obvious it has to do with me." He took a break to sip at his coffee that had finally arrived. Sakuya looked tired.

"Sakuya, how long have you noticed?"

"At least a month." Izumi's eyes widened. "It’s probably been longer though." He sighed.

She had made up her mind. "Okay, Sakuya, I don’t want you to worry about this any longer. I'll take care of it."

"But-"

"No, you have other things to worry about. Coming of Age day is coming and you need to worry about that. Its supposed to be like a festival for those turning 20 and I want you to enjoy it. Let the adults take care of the other adults. Okay?" Sakuya nodded and the conversation made way about the coming holiday.

\---

'You have got to do something.' Masumi's text said. Izumi looked out her window and across the courtyard to the single lit up window. She had to agree if Tsuzuru was still up. She quickly got dressed in her rehearsal wear and left her room. She sent a short message to the playwright before leaving for her destination.

She could see and hear him enter the room from the stage, but she did not let that stop her silent acting. Not until he came closer to the stage and spoke up. "Do you want me to write you a part in the next play?"

The director shook her head. "I'm no longer an actor, but even I practice on the stage occasionally. It helps me direct everyone."

"Then why'd you call me out here?"

"Come sit with me." She patted the floor next to her. She watched Tsuzuru pull himself up onto the stage and sit beside her. "Do you still enjoy being on stage?"

"Of course."

"Really? That hasn't been coming through lately. You have a larger desire you want to pursue, right?"

"No. I won't pursue it."

"But you have one.

He shook his head. "No. Its nothing."

Izumi let the silence fall while she worked out the best working. "Nothing, huh? If it was you wouldn't be staring at a dark computer screen at 2am in the morning because you fear what you'll see in your dreams." She watched as Tsuzuru turned to her, eyes full of disbelief. "Am I wrong? You've been avoiding everyone too. Silently pushing them away as you do."

"Izumi." Tsuzuru's tone was dark and angry.

"You need to let it out, Tsuzuru. Talk to someone about this. I'm right here willing to listen to you. I don’t want you to break or do something you'll regret."

"What do you know!" He snapped.

It only made her hesitate for a second. "I know I've been your director for four years. I know I've watched you grow for those four years. I seen you challenge and accept feats that would make others flee." She stood up and walked a few steps back. "I've watched you fight and make up with the others. I've seen you bloom on this very stage many times. I've even watched you fall in love and come to realize it."

"I haven-"

"I've watched you try to kill those feelings and I've watched you fail at it. Now I've been seeing obsession grown in you. Obsession like that of Hamlet or Monte Cristo. However I don’t want to watch you fall into insanity. I want you to have a happy ending. You need to tell Sakuya how you feel."

"No. I don’t."

"Damn it, Tsuzuru, stop being so childish!" She couldn't help her voice raising.

He stood up in a silent challenge. "How am I being childish? Because I don’t want to hurt him? Because I don’t want to put the troupe in jeopardy?"

"Yes! Only a child thinks he can get through life without hurting anyone. Aside from that you inactions are already putting the troupe in jeopardy! If this goes on, we'll have to replace you!" She watched the fear flood his face. "Everyone will be hurt then. Don’t you understand? None of us want that. Sakuya least of all. You know, he's noticed far longer than any of us. He told me he noticed something over a month ago, but I think he's actually noticed far longer. He's scared, just like you. Scared of disrupting the troupe. He doesn’t know what's wrong so he doesn’t know how to help."

"But..." Tsuzuru's voice was breaking. "I don’t want him to know."

"You don’t want to be hurt." She corrected stepping closer to him.

"I-im scared. Of my own self even. It started out fine.. Innocent. But it's just devolved. I cant handle it. I feel horrible, disgusted with how much I want to claim him. I feel like I'm I'm a more deplorable perverse version of Masumi."

Izumi couldn't help giggling, "I'm sorry it's just you two are nothing alike even in your obsessions. I think if you just talk to Sakuya you'll find out some things." Silence fell. "Tsuzuru, promise me you'll talk to him. Have faith in Sakuya. Do you really think he'd do something he didn’t want to or end your friendship?" Tsuzuru meekly shook his head. "Then trust him. Tell him." He nodded before sighing. Izumi patted his back. "Oh and Tsuzuru? Those desires. Those are normal to have for someone you love romantically. It's nothing to be disgusted about. If you need advice feel free to talk to Sakyou or me, okay?" She could see Tsuzuru's cheeks darken in embarrassment. "Okay I think we've made progress. We should both head back and get some sleep."

\---

"Masumi? What are you doing in my bed?" Izumi asked as she entered her room seeing her younger boyfriend under her covers.

The soon to be adult reached out and pulled the woman close. "Didn’t want to hear Sakuya an Tsuzuru go at it." She looked at him in confusion. "I accidentally sent my message to Sakuya too. He came over after Tsuzuru left and insisted on staying. I'd rather be woken up by you than those two."

Izumi smiled. She knew better. It was no accident, but if Sakuya was determined then maybe this would work out. "Scoot over. I'm tired."

"You're gonna sleep with me?"

"Well, you are in my bed." She allowed her clingy boyfriend to cuddle close to her and fall asleep with his head on her chest. She made a silent prayer that everything would go well.


	2. The smut

Tsuzuru froze after entering his room. There in his bed was the person of his affection and desires. Red hair splayed across his pillow and soft breaths caressing the sheets. Quickly green eyes scanned the room. Masumi was nowhere to be seen. This had to be a dream. He pinched himself hard only to find very real pain. This was worse than his dreams. It was reality. Crossing the room Tsuzuru stopped at his bed. Carefully he shook Sakuya's exposed shoulder. He forced himself to ignore the warmth under his hand. "Sakuya wake up." The young man whined in protest before opening his eyes.

"Tsuzuru, you're back. Welcome home." The brunette force himself to remain unaffected no matter how much he desired to kiss the sleep away from the other.

"Yeah… where's Masumi and why are you in my bed?"

"Masumi?" Sakuya sat up and loomed around. "He must've went to the director's room. Probably didn’t want to be woken up by our arguing."

Tsuzuru moved to his desk. "Are we going to argue?"

"We might, but that depends on you." He smiled like nothing was wrong, but it soon fell flat and his brows knitted together in worry. "I don’t want to argue or fight, but your behavior lately has been affecting not only the troupe but the whole dorm. Everyone is worried you're going to snap and-"

"I've already had this talk with the director."

"O-oh, you have?" Sakuya chuckled nervously. "Then, what did I do to make you so upset with me?"

Tsuzuru refused to look at him, instead choosing to wake up his computer. "You haven’t done anything, Sakuya. This is something I need to deal with."

"But it involves me." No response. "Tsuzuru, since it involves me I want to know what's going on." Again Tsuzuru wasn't responding. "You know, I read that playwrights often write about topics concerning them. It got me to thinking about the recent play you wrote for the Spring troupe." Tsuzuru stopped messing with his computer. "A man fighting his inner demons of greed and lust. He's accompanied by an angel and a devil, each vying to lead him down the path they want. Eventually the man gives in to the devil and dies due to the consequences of his sins. At first I thought you just really wrote another play that would be perfect for us albeit this being a darker play from our usual. Chikage being the man, Itaru the devil, me the angel, Citron being greed, Masumi being lust, and you as the judge. However, now that I've learned more about playwrights I think there’s something more to it."

"And what's that?"

Sakuya looked brightly at Tsuzuru. Finally getting a response. "I was happy to play out another fight scene with Masumi especially since this time it was an emotionally charged scene being the climax. However, it was really embarrassing making all those sounds of pain and being so powerless against Lust." He paused realizing he was getting slightly off topic. "You wanted to show the single point of pureness the man had left to be devoured by lust. You… wanted to see me lose to that lust."

Tsuzuru turned his back on him. "You're the person the man is based off of. But there’s no current end to your story so you played as judge to condemn yourself. To try to kill off your own desires ... for me. Am I right?"

Silence for a moment. "It’s just a story, it's open to interpretation."

"Then what do you think, Tsuzuru?"

"I… I'm just the playw-"

"Stop it! …Please… Tsuzuru, don’t become the man. Don’t deny it anymore." More silence and this time it lasted for minutes. Neither of them daring to move. "Tsuzuru… I'm not an angel. I'm not as pure as you make me out to be. I'm human. I have desires as well. Right now… I desire to hear your real feelings. I want to know what you've been hiding. Please, Tsuzuru."

"I don’t know how to put it into words."

Sakuya chuckled, "I honestly doubt that, but if you don’t want to say it then show me. You're an actor too after all."

"I can’t. I don’t… I don’t want to hurt you."

"Tsuzuru, I don’t think you can hurt me." He paused when the brunette gave him a heated glare. "Unless you punch or kick me, but that's not what you want to do." He was confident in that. Tsuzuru wasn't a fighter like the Autumn troupe. He was-- "you won't hurt me unless I allow it." Tsuzuru was fully looking at him again. Sakuya only smiled, a small blush on his face. He flinched hearing Tsuzuru get up quickly.

"Sakuya ... stop me?" The brunette loomed over the other on his bed.

"Only if I can’t handle it." That seemed to break Tsuzuru's restraint as he crashed his lips against Saluya's. Sakuya made a small sigh as he grasped Tsuzuru's shoulders and pulled him atop of him.

"Sakuya?"

The redhead beamed up at him. "I thought we were going to act out our feelings?" He questioned before pulling Tsuzuru into another kiss. The brunette quickly turned the kiss into a forceful and rough one. “Ah... Tsuzu...ru…” Sakuya managed between kisses. He could feel the adrenaline and lust starting to course through his veins. He was getting light headed from the lack of air and felt his grip on Tzurus’s shoulder slip. That seemed to make the other aware of what was happening.

“Sakuya? I’m sorry, I-”

“It’s… okay. I just need some air, then… it’s my turn.” He saw the surprise overcome the fear in the green eyes above him. It didn’t last long as Tsuzuru hid his face in the space beside Sakuya’s neck. At least, that’s what Sakuya thought until he felt lips press against his neck. It tickled and he couldn’t help a giggle until he felt tongue and teeth. Sakuya could tell that Tsuzuru was holding back. He pulled the brunette closer. The redhead managed to wrap his arms around the one atop him. “Mm, go ahead Tsuzuru. Mark me.”

Given permission he felt Tsuzuru nip at the thin flesh on his neck. It stung, but it wasn’t unbearable. Tsuzuru made up for it kissing and sucking on the love bites he made. Sakuya could’t help the groans and whimpers that left his mouth. He didn’t want to either. He felt too good. The heat of another body was new and he was undoubtedly forming an erection. It felt too quick though. “Tsuzuru. Pause.” Surprisingly the brunette backed off allowing Sakuya to calm down a bit. “Do I looked debauched enough?”

“Hmm, it’s a good start.”

Sakuya smiled, Tsuzuru was responding verbally. “You look pretty messed up too.” 

A soft chuckle followed, “I can imagine.”

“Tsuzuru. How far?” That seemed to knock a small bit of clarity into the other. “I don’t mind going all the way. I’ve practiced a few times.”

“Seriously?”

The redhead nodded, “I told you I wasn’t as pure as you think I am. I am human and hormones affect me.” Sakuya paused as his fingers toyed with the hem of Tsuzuru’s shirt. “Should I show you proof?” 

Tsuzuru grasped Sakuya’s hands. “I do, but first… Sakuya, I don’t want this to be a one time thing. I don’t only want sex. I know I’ve been… sexually frustrated recently, but I do care about you. Since we first met. It started slowly, but I noticed it during our second year here. I really like you, Sakuya.”

He could feel his blush deepen before he smiled coyly. “You can’t say ‘I love you’ yet, huh?” He laughed seeing Tsuzuru’s blush grow to his ears and down his neck. Taking advantage of the brunette’s embarrassment Sakuya flipped their positions. He quickly pressed a kiss to Tsuzuru’s forehead then initiated a deep yet tender kiss. It took a few moments before Tsuzuru was groaning and whimpering into the kiss. When he felt fingers pull at the edge of his shirt Sakuya backed off. The redhead beamed at his work.

“Did… did you practice kissing too?”

“I read up on it. I figured you would have written a kissing scene at some point. Guess that’s going to be in the next play for us.” Deciding that the conversation was over Sakuya kissed Tsuzuru again this time being slightly more passionate until Sakuya pulled away. “One more thing before we get serious.”

Tsuzuru could guess what Sakuya was going to bring up. “Shit… I don’t have anything. I… never thought this would happen.” He paused pointing to Masumi’s desk. Wait... Masumi might have some.” Sakuya hopped off the bed and went to rummage through his friend’s drawer. He’d repay him later. When he turned back to Tsuzuru he saw the brunette getting more comfortable and taking off his shirt. It wasn’t like this was the first time he’d see the other naked, but it was in this sort of situation. “Bashful?”

Sakuya shook his head as he returned to the bed. “Just… a bit nervous. I may have practiced, but…” He saw Tsuzuru nod in understanding and shared sentiment. He straddled the other’s hips. Nervous or not he wanted this too. “...I’m a bit slow. So I didn’t realize until just before the play. I thought you deserved to know.”

“Thank you.” Tsuzuru murmured before pulling Sakuya down for a kiss. Tenderness turned to passion and when Sakuya surfaced his breathing was labored. Feeling Tsuzuru’s hand push up his nightshirt Sakuya removed the article of clothing. He allowed green eyes to quickly roam down his chest before deciding to get to business. They could explore each other next time. Right now they needed to release the tension they felt. Sakuya started by marking the other. It wasn’t long before the brunette was groaning unconsciously pushing his hips up towards the redhead. 

The redhead made his way down the brunette’s chest leaving a trail of kissed. By the time he reached the hem of the other’s jeans fingers were twisting and pulling at bed sheets. Nervous fingers fumbled with the button, but eventually succeeded. He pulled the clothing off leaving green boxers. Maneuvering the flaps of cloth he revealed the straining flesh and had to remind himself to breathe. Sakuya was trying to remember what he had read with his lust hazed mind. He placed a gentle kiss on the tip of Tsuzuru’s erection. The gasp he heard encouraged him to do more. He continued to place kisses up and and down the organ. Slowly he flattened his tongue and licked up. Tsuzuru’s head snapped back as a moan escaped him. 

He continued to push the brunette to the edge. “Sa-saku… p-please…” Tsuzuru gasped out. Obliging Sakuya finally wrapped his lips around the erection and pushed his head down. This, he hadn’t practiced and he was realizing he should have. Still, Tsuzuru was responding well. After a few moments Sakuya moved his hand from the other’s hips to further pleasure him. “Gonna… I can’t…” He tried to remove himself before it happened, but was too slow. Cum entered his mouth and strung across his face. It was bitter and tasted bad. He couldn’t help a surprised and disgusted sound from his throat. “Ugn, s-sorry…”

“It just tastes different. I can get used to it.” Tsuzuru groaned in reply as he couldn’t manage any more words at the moment. Ruby-colored eyes watched the other man slowly come down from his climax. “Feel any better?” He asked once their breathing calmed. 

“A bit.” He murmured, eyes closed. “I’m not completely satisfied though.”

“I hoped you wouldn’t be. Otherwise you’d be leaving me in a difficult position.”

Green eyes opened, “can I… watch you?”

“Of course,” Sakuya smiled, “until you get hard again.” Tsuzuru sat up carefully watching his as he squeezed lube into his hand. He warmed up the gel before reaching back to his entrance. He could easily put one finger in then started to prep himself. He curled his finger, pushing against his own walls, and slipped in and out the initial ring of muscle. After a while, his mind was starting to feel numb with pleasure, but it wasn’t enough. Finally he slipped his second finger in groaning in discomfort. Sakuya flinched feeling a hand rub his shoulder. He had gotten so lost in his task that he nearly forgot that Tsuzuru was watching him.

“Is it getting painful? That position?” Sakuya nodded feeling as though words would fail him. This was painful. By this point he was usually spent due to also jerking himself off, but he had refrained from doing such this time. “Then, can I?” Again he nodded before pulling his fingers out. After helping Tsuzuru lube up his fingers and guided him to his entrance. Sakuya bit his lower lip feeling forgein fingers push into him. He couldn’t help a whine as he felt those fingers go as far as they could. Slowly, Tsuzuru let his curiosity lead his actions while being attentive to Sakuya’s reactions. “Sakuya, I think I’m ready again.” Tsuzuru said in a low tone. 

Sakuya was gone enough that words weren’t coming anymore. Saliva was dripping off his chin before he whined feeling Tsuzuru pull away. His body knew what it wanted though so he pushed the man under him to lay on his back. He hadn’t even noticed that the other had rolled on a condom while watching him prep. Lining himself up Sakuya didn’t mute a loud moan that reached his falsetto range as he sank onto Tsuzuru’s erection. A breathy chuckle left him as he heard the other curse. Sakuya didn’t let Tsuzuru adjust before he rose and dropped back down. They moaned in unison prompting the redhead to repeat his actions. Sakuya bounced with rhythm until he slipped and keened loudly. His restraint completely unraveled as he now focused on chasing his climax. Tsuzuru was no better especially, but he aimed to help Sakuya the redhead tensed and gasped his climax overtaking him. Tsuzuru drunk in the precious seconds after before Sakuya’s tensing muscles pulled him over the edge too.


	3. Epilogue

Izumi watched as Sakuya beamed at Tsuzuru the next day. Something had happened. Perhaps the two of them finally talked it out. At least it seemed like Tsuzuru was back to normal with how he smiled and played along with Citron’s jabs. She laughed at their antics before seeing Sakoda walk into the lounge with bags under his eyes and sighing. “Sakoda? Are you okay?”

“Morning, Boss Lady. I’m fine. Just some... Noises were kept the Boss and I up last night.” The young yakuza glanced at the small group of Spring troupe members. She noticed that both Tsuzuru and Sakuya flinched upon hearing that. “Had to stop the boss from tearing down the walls and doors trying to find the source. Told him it was probably just rats since this building is so old and to just call some exterminators today.”

She hummed, “Well, I’m sure those rats won’t be making any more trouble.” Sakoda looked at her in confusion. “Right, Sakyou?” She asked the approaching man who was obviously in a sour mood.

“Not unless they want to be caught, shamed, and displayed for all to see.” He grumbled taking the coffee cup that Izumi offered then kissed the crown of her head. He sipped the bitter liquid before heading for the door, calling for Sakoda to follow. He paused in the doorway. “Oh, and Tsuzuru.”

“Yes!”

“Don’t make me scold you like you did to Izumi a few weeks ago. Hypocrisy isn’t like you.” The yakuza glared then left. She could only laugh as Tsuzuru paled with a quiet complaint.


End file.
